Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Do you like me?

I have a confession to make. I like for people to like me. It really troubles me when they don't. I live in AWE of those people everyone likes. HOW? Were they just born with it or is it a skill they had to perfect? I make friends really easily and usually keep my closest friends, well, forever. I have some that date all the way back to first grade that I TREASURE! Despite mostly being liked, there have always been a few people that just really actively did not like me. Usually it is a person or two here or there and not a serenity stealer. Everyone is NOT going to like me, they don't HAVE to like me.

However, lately, in one area of my life, I just can't seem to 'fit in'. I am experiencing people STRONGLY disliking me.

MOST of the time, it just feels like my personality is not appreciated. I used to tell myself it was all my perception. However, NOW, for the first time-I am questioning that. I am not thinking it is my perceptions-it is reality. I am actively avoided and dreaded. I can't explain why, but I feel it and it is real. I DO know that if someone has a problem with me and they don't take the steps to resolve it, they are the ones in the wrong.

So what to do? I have no clue. I almost feel like I need to apologize in advance for every word that comes out of my mouth. I feel like I am constantly being judged as a trouble maker/problem child-EVEN when there is a legitimate issue. I have reached a point where if I am going to be labeled and avoided by those who are 'helping' me grow...I'm probably not going to experience any growth.

4 comments:

ShortyMom said...

I certainly can't tell you what to do about the situation but wanted to tell you that you are not alone! There are some days I hate myself because I feel like I don't fit in anywhere! My prayers are with you as you work this out...

Ami said...

It's tough. We want to be liked while at the same time acting like we don't care if someone likes us or not.

I think I prefer being liked (who doesn't?) but I've reached the age that I've learned to hang out mostly with people who WILL appreciate me.

I don't have time to cultivate relationships with people who don't.

I feel confident that if I met you in person I'd like you.

Teressa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Teressa said...

Sorry about the deleted comment my fingers got mixed up badly and I hit the wrong button.

I used to be like that;I worried about others liking me.Humans are strange creatures and we do not like everyone we come in contact with.I use to have a problem with a person at a social function involving my daughter.I learned to not reply to the negativity and to not show a rise out of me when she said nasty things.I found out if I was nice to her it drove her nuts.Don't let them run you away from something if you like it;they think they have won and you have lost.Being a bigger person is hard and I struggle everyday with some people but in the end you know you are right by being the better person.
I would give you a hug if I could.Be strong and keep your head up.