Sunday, July 08, 2007

Bad Day

Yup, I'm having one. I have been desperately counting my blessings for two days. I'm telling myself I should be really happy, I am blessed. Then, I give myself permission to feel bad if I want, it's only a feeling. Then I get sucked into the doldrums again and feel like I am far to blessed to feel so yuck. I am trying to put my finger on what exactly is "wrong". I can't.
I don't feel like a good wife, mom, and certainly lacking in all areas of domestication.

Erik took the girls to church with him, he goes early. I have puttered around and done some things to straighten up and it feels nice to be all alone. Misery doesn't really love company. I have to go get a shower and get ready for church before the devil talks me into another hour. I am reminded of the Simpson's episode where Homer stays home from church and has the best day ever and Marge and the kids go and the church heat is off and it is freezing-they have the worst day ever. I feel a little like Homer today. Except I will paint on my church face and play the everything is wonderful role. Hopefully, by the end of the day, it will be. I think that's called "Fake it til you make it."

2 comments:

Jacinda said...

God is known to bless us when we go to church even when we feel like staying home, right?!?! (((hugs)))

Mia said...

think not how you can get a blessing but how you can bless someone else!! You will never know who you might bless with you contagious smile and wonderful sense of humor even if you are faking....I know cause I have been on the receiving end of that blessing from you!!