Tuesday, May 16, 2006

This is completely stolen from www.crazedmommyofthree.blogspot.com and I think she stole it from someone else. I am posting it because it makes me laugh my head off and I break alot of the rules!! PLUS< I am totally a crazed mommy of three as well! I do have to brag just a bit though, my toenails are totally cute right now-red with white polka dots that I did myself. But my heels are a little crusty and cracked so I guess they cancel out.

The Open Toed Shoe Pledge

"As a member of the Cute Girl Sisterhood, I pledge to follow the Rules when wearing sandals and other open-toe shoes:

I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.

I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.

I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow.

I will shave the hairs off my big toe.

I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there.

If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back into place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.

I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good friend Dr. Scholl's if my feet need him.

I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids' sizes. This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others. No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat and I would hate to take someone down with me as I fall and break my ankle.

I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell and begin to look like Vienna sausages.

I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her that her toes are as long as my fingers and no sandal makes creepy feet look good.

I will promise if I wear flip flops that I will ensure that they actually flip and flop, making the correct noise while walking and I will swear NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.

I will promise to go my local nail salon at least once per season and have a real pedicure (they are about $20 and worth EVERY penny).

I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs of wear... nothing is tackier than dirty white sandals."


~d said...

OMIGOD, OMIGOD, OMIGOD !!! I totally thought I was the only one who ( might/possibly ) have a ( or know of someone who ) may have a hair on their big toe.

Juliabohemian said...

I have hair on my big toe, but it is really light and hard to see.

I LOATHE people who have yucky feet and wear sandals. How hard is it to maintain something like that??? Yellow or brown nails, big scaly patches. Chipped polish is forgivable but the other stuff is a hygiene issue. I hate it when people with icky feet take off their shoes and prop their feet up.

I think I have a complex about this because my Dad, when I was about 1, had a forklift go through his foot. They took skin from his hip and grafted it onto the foot. He used to take his shoes off and put his feet up on the coffee table. When I was a kid I was SO grossed out by it.

Susie said...

How cute are your toenails Jan! Mine are shocking pink with gold hearts.

Sandals fit (except for the bulging thing from time to time when I'm bloating), toenails good, feet filed smooth, toes shaved, I do wear pantyhose in the winter, no busted shoes, no corns, no jelly shoes (ick!), I take toe rings off at the end of the day, can't do the brutally honest thing (I do have tact), no scuffling flip flops, LOL--I've only had a paid for pedicure once in my life, and by golly if I'm not wearing scuffed white sandals today (LOL)!

Jacinda said...


Emily said...

So cute and funny. I try to keep cute feet, but I admit that I don't have the best looking feet in the world. Chronically rough heels, sorry about that. But at least I try to keep my toes pretty. :) And I like my flip flops to make that noise!

jessica said...

I have gotten 3 pedicures already this season... I am following the rules like a good girl!

Heather said...

You haven't posted lately!!!!