A Foot in Both Worlds

Public school and home school, that is.  It is nearly impossible not to constantly compare the two and then second guess myself to death.  On one hand, I KNOW we are where we are supposed to be.  I have observed many signs to let me know the decision to go back to school was the correct one for our family.  I still worry though.  I worry about bullies, school work, drugs, sex and the lack of God in the school.  I worry that my strong willed girls will become go-with-the-flow girls.  I worry that they might compromise their values to 'fit in' better.

Also, public school is the most expensive free education ever!!  There is always something that comes up that requires something from me, financially speaking.  Lunch money, snack day, field trip, reward day, fundraisers...endless fundraisers.  Homeschool curriculum is definitely not cheap, but it is a one time cost.  There are not any surprise expenses, all expenses can be planned well in advance.

Overall, I am pleased with school.  All three girls continue to be on the honor roll.  They are excited by school, learning and projects.  They are genetically programmed to be teacher pleasers-it comes from both sides-so they like their teachers and the teachers like them.  Erika made the track team and is very excited about that.  Kayla is still shopping for what her extra-curricular activities will be.  It is a good thing for all of us.

However, there is a small part of me that misses having everyone home.  Pajama days, family trips whenever we wanted to take them, field trips to anywhere we wanted, and taking a day off to enjoy a beautiful weather day.

Then I think about ALWAYS being together, squabbles and bickering.  I think about lesson plans and grading papers.  I think about the constant guilt and inner conflict telling me I need to lighten up or do more, depending on my mood that week.  Cooking three meals a day and never getting 'caught up' with anything.  And like a cherry on top, add to all of that the endless doctors appointments with a handicapped mom and three surly girls...

...SCHOOL tomorrow!!  I can hardly wait!