Wednesday, March 16, 2011

ARGH!!!

Some days I wonder what it would take to make me happy.  I feel so ungrateful while being amazingly blessed.  Nothing goes right, everything just adds to my bad mood.  The loved ones in my life make me want to scream.  I get depressed over the things on my 'to do list' that remain undone.  I resent that I can't get big tasks accomplished because of all the little ones that have to be done over and over...like dishes, cooking and laundry. 

Other days, I feel so happy I think I may burst.  I count my blessings and feel like I could keep counting for a week.  I love everything and everyone.  I feel grateful for all the possessions I have and that they don't possess me.  I am content.  I feel fearfully and wonderfully made and gifted for a purpose.  I feel peace even in the valleys.  I am able to bestow grace on myself and others-whether they deserve it or not...which is what grace is all about!!

Guess which one is the God honoring one?

Wrong, unless you said both.  He wants all of me, even the yucky part that makes me want to hide my head in shame.  The second paragraph sounds better, feels better and exemplifies what it means to be a Christian.  But being a Christian looks like the first paragraph too.  We all have those days.  I am only different from the rest of the world because of Jesus-and he died for EVERY HUMAN BEING on earth.  He makes me perfect to God.  It is not anything I can do, even on my best day.  I have to give my whole self to God and HE will help me be paragraph two if I let Him...when I let Him. 

I do hope to have a second paragraph day tomorrow though. 

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