There is a Christian book speaks to the fact that God uses cracked vessels. Tonight, I can verify that. About three weeks ago, I began planning a ladie's night out for our church. We had not had one in forever. I got one of my favorite people to agree to hosting it and went from there. I love games and fun, light entertainment and was planning the ice breaker games. However, at the library today, I was finishing up a library book that was due. Eat the Cookie, Buy the Shoes by Joyce Meyer. The urge came over me so strongly that I needed to take notes and present a couple of the chapters tonight. I took a few notes but I didn't really feel comfortable presenting things that God is really working on in me. As I looked up verse after verse, it just kept convicting me that this is the material I needed to be studying. I thought of my friend, Jane, who recently lost her battle with cancer. I thought about how the story of her life lined up so much with this book. I thought of how different my life is because of the time I knew and was friends with Jane-the mighty way God used her in my life. Nothing grandiose, just Jane being Jane, but it was powerful.
After arriving, I chatted with Carla and awaited the arrival of the ladies. We had no idea who was coming and decided it would be fun even if no one showed up. As we said the blessing and began to eat and fellowship, I sat over by myself to work on my presentation. I was nervous but sure this was what I was supposed to be doing. Then a lady joined me. This is someone I have known for a short while and someone my husband worked with for years. They worked together long enough that I know some of her 'dirt' through the grapevine and she knew I knew AND, she wanted to 'clear her name' so to speak. As we talked, she kept asking me questions and talking about how nervous she was tonight and at church in general. Almost everything we talked about referred back to my notes and the chapters I had read in the book. I shared some of my past with her-it is funny how we tend to think other people have no skeletons in their closet. I let her know a few of mine and then shared that it didn't matter-I was forgiven. My past doesn't define me anymore-and hers doesn't either. God already knows we are not perfect...He loves us anyway.
A sense of calm washed over me. I wasn't even sure that much about the material I was covering. I presented the material I had prepared. I have my notes-but I don't really know what all I said. I did speak from the heart and other than that, I hope I helped and did not harm anyone. HOWEVER, what I do know is this: I was in that place at that time, studied up on that topic for that lady and that conversation. Everything else was just what I thought was tonight's plan. God used a cracked vessel and a broken past to give a fellow broken person the Hope that is Christ. I am honored and humbled beyond words.