Oy With the Poodles Already!

That title has absolutely nothing to do with this post. However, I love that phrase and there are just not any occasions to use it.

I feel really bad today. I have been repenting and talking to God off and on all day about my attitude. It really stunk today. All day. I punched my church timecard today. This means I went to church because I was supposed to. I hardly ever do that and almost never on a Sunday-it is usually a Wednesday thing (unless Sara teaches-or any good debate type class!). Most assuredly-this should never happen on EASTER!! My goodness, I practically LIVE to go to church. I look forward to it. I think of all my church friends and plan strategies for how I can talk to them and still get to know some of the new people AND please my hubby by not talking too long. I try to utilize my time at church effectively by NOT talking to people I have conversations with all the time and hone in on the people seen exclusively at church. As I type these truths, I realize I need to REALLY get out more. Plus, Hula told me that too. (Mental note: Get out more. Mental reply: I really don't want to, I get out exactly as much as I want to. Mental note: People are talking-just get out more already! Mental reply: It's OK to talk to yourself as long as you don't answer yourself...uh oh.) So today-I DID NOT want to go. Usually, my attitude changes almost as soon as I walk through the door. Today it did not. In fact, it worsened. It was a wonderfully well-planned service singing a whole bunch of my favorite songs and our whole family sat together and took communion together...and STILL, a constant song of "I don't want to be here" playing in my head. I think I need to recharge a bit during this co-op break. I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell...

Perhaps this week, I need to actively plan my return to Bible study!! It is much much needed.