Supermom really got me to thinking with her "Make Me Over" post. Last night was my homeschool support meeting which was glorious. My friend Jennifer rode with me (what was she thinking!!) and when she showed up, she looked gorgeous (she usually does). I decided to go in and put on some lipstick and eyeliner and change shirts. I was having a decent hair day so I looked alright. This topic of "looking our best" came up many times through the night. Several of us were standing in the parking lot talking into the wee hours of the night (a Janice tradition). We concluded no one really likes their hair and no one ever really feels good about how they look. Why is that?? I know I am VERY disappointed about my size. It grieves me every day, and yet I don't do anything to change it. Off and on I have tried things, but nothing too serious for too long. I have some pretty deep-rooted self-esteem issues( a product of the lovely home environment I grew up in) and I guess I hide there with all my baggage. Sorry to get off on that track!!!

I suppose the point of this all is to say that I had my day in my teens and early 20's. I spent alot of money on myself and my hair and I was looking good. I snagged me a man and now that chapter of looking good is closed forever!! Just kidding!! I was still looking good up until I got pregnant and then it was downhill from there. ( : Stop it with the sarcasm crazy woman.

It IS different now. We are a one-income family. I have three children with needs and wants. I have a husband with needs and wants. When I had great hair in my 20s, it was high-maintenance($$). I can't afford that luxury now...actually that isn't true, I WON'T afford that luxury now. It is a corner I DECIDED to cut. I do the best I can with what GOD gave me and it all works out OKAY. There will come a day when there will time and money to spend on myself. I can wait. Until then, yard sale treasures in my size and good hair days are a blessing. $100 beauty days are not. I can handle it. I am not a martyr, I am a realist. Beauty costs big bucks, even if you shop at Walmart. I would rather take a vacation with my family then get my roots touched up. I would rather get the curriculum I want than have a spa day. I am making some sacrifices. Do I feel empty and depleted and neglected? NO, quite the contrary, the things I am not participating in make me more in touch with the woman God calls me to be.

Please don't think I am judging anyone who gets their hair done or spends alot of money on clothes. We are all unique-there is no mold every woman fits in(contrary to the world's view)The truth is, I have never liked make-up and hair the way some women I know do. I always liked doing sports and outdoorsy things and it always seemed awkward to juggle hair and makeup with the out-of-doors. Bees really like the smell of perfumes and hairspray. Having children was just the straw that broke the camel's back and made me walk away from FRU-FRU forever.

Also, I know when my three girls get to be teenagers, they will be writing Oprah about how awful I look and we will all 5 get an all expense paid trip to Chicago because of how I have let myelf go for so long.