Sunday, May 07, 2006

"More than thunder, more than thunder. More than thunder, more than thunder. More than thunder. MORE THAN THUNDER. More than thunder MOOOOORE THAN THUNDERRRR." Sings Lilly, my little songbird, as she tornadoes through the house deciding what will be her next "thing" to do.

"Stop singing that Lilly. It is sooooo annoying", cries Kayla my middle child born with no patience or tolerance.

This makes Lilly sing even more and a little louder. Inside I smile a little, until it escalates into a full blown fight. (It ALWAYS does.) I smile a little because she heard this at church. She loves to sing church songs, only at home though. I have done the part of being the example. I have felt the conviction of "Praise me amidst the throngs of people" and I have sung loud enough for others to hear in church. (I am not a good singer and never have been...being around singers makes me nervous because I know they are LISTENING!!) This has not prompted even one of my children to sing in church. They sing with praise music on the radio at home and in the car. And just loudly with no radio or music. I so want to fill their pretty little heads with music about God and Jesus and GLORY! We listen to christian music all the time we are not listening to books on CD's. I want God and everything about him to permeate our life in every way. I am trying tirelessly to overcome the bad vices that I have that influence them with an equal or greater influence of good!

My husband and I have many recurring disagreements and one of them is over music. He is a drummer and also very talented singer(he keeps that to himself but he can sing every part-real high and real low). He does not sing very often-I think he must have been teased about it or something. He listens to EVERYTHING. You can't even imagine some of the things we have been subjected to on WKMS (local college public radio). Irish yodeling, mariachi type music, bluegrass, opera, classical, twangin' country and punk rock just to name a few. The girls think it is great. They have his love for music so I tolerate. I do not like the popular music that is contaminating the airwaves and even some of the "oldies". While he is listening to music, I am listening to lyrics and saying..."Turn it!! turn it!!" I do not hear music very well and can finally pick out instruments, but being a wordsmith, I know the words and I know our much beloved music of yesteryears is awful! The music he plays with his band is as well. My children are SPONGES. Lilly picks up the tune and the words after about ONE listen. This is very telling when she has had a day with Daddy and comes back singing. He does not share my concern over music/lyrics. He says he listened to the same stuff all his life and did not even get what it was saying until I pointed it out.

I bring up all of this to marvel over the differences in what we worry about. I worry about what they will contaminate their mind with and he worries about only one thing...BOYS. I am so thankful and hopeful that God knew what he was doing when he gave us as parents to our children. While our disagreements are so plentiful, I see what we offer them most of all-BALANCE. But I know for a fact boys and men are Erik's biggest panic button. We saw one of our friends kids at Spring Carnival and she is a gorgeous teenager. She has long beautiful blonde hair and looks just like....a woman. I know though, despite trying to look and act sexy, she is still a child. I see it in my older girl scouts. They look so mature and then they start talking about how cool Garfield is or how they miss playing with barbies. It is so important that they have guidance through the "sexy" years when boys and men can't help but notice them. All this greatly improves my prayer life and dependence on God. I am praying diligently that he will guide me in laying the groundwork that will get my girls through those years with their dinity and purity still intact. I had no guidance at all, so I had to learn all things the hard way. I hope and pray that each one of my girls will be open to instruction and cousel through the tough years.

What a serious post I have today. Erika's 10th birthday looms in the distance and I shudder a little at reaching double digits. I'm glad we are away from public school and its young sexiness, but I am not so naive as to think this will be a cure-all. Sexuality in this country is only acted out in schools. Its core is movies and TV and it ripples through every level of our country-even church. We snicker at the sexual innuendo in G rated disney movies. We admit it is out of place but seem assured it is going over their heads...really? For how long? I join you Jacinda in the only prayer that makes me able to keep on keepin' on:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.

Truly words to live by.


Susie said...

Wow. That was a deep post. But I'm there with ya. Music speaks to me in ways that nothing else does. I also love many many different kinds of music. But I found out early on how those lines in secular music can come back to haunt you. I can clearly remember a little girl I used to take care of, singing, "Guys do it, all the time!" with me standing there with my mouth open. And when my oldest was 2 years old, he would belt loud and clear "Long Neck Bottle". : O I do try to do better. We listen to Christian music in the car. My problem is that I keep the TV on CMT quite a bit at work. So, I come home singing, "Honky-tonk Badonkadonk". Guess what my 2 y/o sings clearly? You got it. They really are sponges.

jessica said...

I love all types of music... especially stuff with a heavy beat. My husband could do without any music and it is a constant battle between us because he feels I am too liberal with what I let the kids listen to. He is probably right... and the lyrics now days are awful... but that love of music that I have is in them too. Each has their favorite station and their favorite songs. There have been many times we have turned off the radio during a questionable song to have a discussion about why the song was not ok. Good luck with this struggle.

jjofar said...

My husband is also a musician. Mostly James Taylor, but a little old Merle Haggard as well. He plays and sings in church, but also at a BBQ restaraunt on the weekends for fun. I truly feel that the Holy Spirit speaks through music to our children. My 4 year old son at Easter Sunday service raised his hands to "Grace Like Rain". My husband and I don't always do this, but when I asked him about it he said it made his tummy tickle and he was 'praisin' the Lord'. I had a hard time explaining to him why I had tears in my eyes.
I also dated a guy in college that thought Jars of Clay were too heavy for him??? I was raised conservative, but WOW!
I just pray hard and don't expose my boys to things on purpose that I know are questionable.
Go hubby with the nail salon!!!

Juliabohemian said...

I sing at my church. There is nothing more frustrating than facing a congregation that is wearily staring back and you and barely trying to mouth the words.

Even with that said, my kids tell me to please not sing in the car. You would think it was the sound of nails on a chalkboard to them.

Also: I remember being 13 and going to camp. I was developed rather early but emotionally still a child, of course. The older guys were all being SO nice to me and I couldn't figure out why. I enjoyed their attention of course. In hindsight I feel like a fool. It wasn't my fault. My mom never talked to me about things. She was of the belief that girls with big boobs must be sluts and whatnot. Any attention I got must have been my own fault, right? Years of therapy baby...years.

jettybetty said...

I was very picky about what our kids listened to--I clearly remember the day one said something straight out of one of my oldies songs from the radio. We listened to only Jesus-praising music after that.

Jacinda said...

In the car, I mostly (I won't say always) listen to the local Christian radio station. We also listen to our Steve Green "Hide 'em In Your Heart" cd's often in the car and at home. We also listen to ZOE alot at home. Now, like I said, I didn't say always, but very often.

Katie's favorite is "Amen" (I don't know if that's what it's called) but it's one of the Steve Green songs and she loves it! The word Amen is the main lyric. Quite catchy tune, too!

I used to listen to country alot and now that's gotten dangerous too. ("Tequila makes her clothes fall off" for instance.~Not something I want my children singing!)