Thursday, May 03, 2007

Why is marriage so stinkin' hard? Life flows along wonderfully until there is some conflict or other, then it is soooooo hard. I have been spending some time at the Marriage Builders website which is run by Dr. William Harley. He is great. Even he admits marriage counseling is the hardest counseling. It is because we are both right. We each believe our opinion is the right one. If he could only accept the rules.
1. I am always right.
2. If I am ever wrong, refer to rule number one.

I guess it is probably because he has the same rules.

Don't get me wrong here, hubby and I have a good marriage. We are very much in love and care a great deal about each other. We are committed to this roller coaster ride that is marriage. I just really prefer the peaks to the valleys. Don't you?

5 comments:

Jen, Fred, Jennifer or Mom said...

oh yeah......must be a full moon, hubby and I had a valley this week too. Oh well, that would be life.

You are not alone.....

Write From Karen said...

Oh yeah, marriage ups are definitely better than those downs. If it's any consolation, we've all been there. *smile*

There was a time period I wasn't sure the hubs and I were going to make it. He was being such a ... well, it takes two to tango. At any rate, it wasn't until we were honest with OURSELVES first that we were able to talk things through and compromise.

And we did indeed compromise. People can't change entirely, but they can certainly make adjustments - and that's what we did. After I found out the things that really bugged him, I worked on making sure I never did those things again and vice versa.

We're coming up on our 17th anniversary this month and couldn't be happier.

Hang in there.

Leigh said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog earlier. I'll keep an eye on ya.

hulagirlatheart said...

I think one reason it seems so hard is that we are trained from an early age to think that it's easy to fall in love, find your soulmate, get married and live happily forever. Years of fairy tales and princess movies have us searching for a mythical lover as we become young adults. We never saw Sleeping Beauty washing out the Prince's dirty drawers AFTER picking them up off the floor AGAIN. Cinderella didn't have to put her Prince Charming on an allowance because he spent way too much money on toys and Snow White's man didn't pretend to listen to her while he was really daydreaming about the Hooters girls. We perpetuate these myths when young people get married, focusing more energy on a big, beautiful wedding and less on the marriage. Of course, if we were completely realistic with soon to be newlyweds, they would run like scared rabbits and the institution of marriage would die a quick death.:)

Mia said...

I think it also has to do with how society has "dumbed down" the man of the house. I mean you see it everywhere...commercials, movies, self-help books. They all say and portray the husband as a complete idiot and women RULE the world.
Don't get me wrong I am all for strong females, I'd like to think of myself as one BUT if you take the "man" out of men then the home follows.....