Leadership

It is funny, we all strive to raise children that grow into leaders. I remember being groomed and trained for leadership my whole school career. I was labeled a leader and great things were expected of me. It is only in the past, oh 5 years maybe, that I have realized the most essential element of leadership. Wanting what is best for all involved, even if that means I don't get my way. As a matter of fact, leaders seldom get their way. Why wasn't I trained about that?

Since serving on the PATCH board this year, I have really learned alot about serving/leading people on a corporate level. It is an education that is painful. Here are the highlights:

• You really can't please everyone.
• The blame game is alive and well.
• There are no *perks*.
• Some people are best ignored.
• Some people enjoy keeping the sh*t pot stirred. (They are known as turds.)
• There is that one person who could do everything so much better than anyone else...if they had the time. However, they have no time.
• Enforcing rules delicately is an oxymoron.

I could go on and on, but I won't-it's depressing!!

Things I am thankful for:

• Friends who encourage me to be the best me that I can.
• There are still people who step up into leadership positions, knowing what they are in for.
• To mentor and to have been mentored.
• I am thankful for having a very sensitive nature coupled with brassy boldness even though it gets me into trouble daily.
• The guidelines God gives us for dealing with conflict. How much easier the world would be if we all followed these guidelines!!

Matthew 18:15-17

15. If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. 16. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses. 17. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or tax collector.

I wish I could say that I always follow these guidelines. I don't. But I try. After this learning season, I try even harder. Gossip kills but grace and compassion give new life, abundantly.

A Review: The Liturgical Year

The Liturgical Year: The Spiraling Adventure of the Spiritual Life by Joan Chittister is the full name of this book. I was so excited to receive this book to review. I am fascinated with the Catholic religion. I love all the ceremony surrounding and including their regular worship. I believe that God is not only in the plain and mundane, but He should also be in high places. He should be revered, celebrated with a feast, celebrated with a fast. He should also be a part of the day to day. We are created in His image which means He will have as many facets as we do, as many different subtexts as our lives can hold.

However, this book did not meet my expectations. This book was more of a philosophy book. Instead of going into detail about the different customs in detail, she merely discusses each tradition. The book I was expecting has probably already been written...I'm checking into the footnoted sources.

Reading this book was a learning experience though, I loved her point that years are not ever alike, they are not merely a calendar function. The years we live are each unique from one another and shape us into the people God means for us to be. She also eludes to the fact that if we live each year liturgically, as Christ did, we will become more Christlike. The things done as rote do 'settle in' to our psyches and make us more like He was. I am a firm believer in this opinion. Habits may seem trite as first, but they do shape us. Most Christians go to church on Sunday. If they don't, it says more about church today than it does about rituals. I guarantee that if one has spent a lifetime attending church on Sunday, that person is thinking about God on Sunday. Maybe in a rebellious way, maybe in a worshipping way-but the habit has done what it was supposed to, created a remembrance.

I flirt with the idea of converting to Catholicism, just to learn the rituals, customs, etc. And so if I see someone from church in the liquor store, neither of us has to feel guilty about it.

If It's Not One Thing, It's Two!

While I was finishing up my shopping, Mount Washmore declared itself an independent nation. Mount Papers To Be Graded has also seceded from our peaceful union and declared war on my soul. There is nothing to be done but fight the good fight as their troops outnumber my troops exponentially. So there you go, accomplish one thing and seven other things revolt. I am woman hear me roar. (Woman's work is NEVER done!!)

I have now finished my month of teaching the 2 year olds-kindergarten at church. I have thoroughly enjoyed it, despite choosing a 5 Sunday month. It has been great working with children so far from my own developmentally. The only problem is that some of my crafts were a bit over their head. Two year olds cannot glue 100 construction paper squares into little squares on a paper. No, not even with help. Even if it gives them a visual for how old Abraham was when Isaac was born. It will take almost the entire class time to "help" them all finish.

All three of my children were delighted to help me prepare for my teaching endeavor and Kayla was my helper in the actual class. It allowed me to see what wonderful servants my children are growing into. I know I am way too hard on my kiddos. I can't help but constantly be in 'help them develop into a better person' critical mode instead of 'praise them for being great kids' mode. I really need to fix that about myself.

It has been a busy, fun holiday weekend. Erik's sister Marla and her family were in for Thanksgiving. There were also some extended family members present. We had a great meal and then traveled to my sister's to visit with my family. Baby Noah was completely done smiling by the time we got there. I held him anyway. I don't see him enough to be choosy about his moods. Saturday we savored every moment of the gorgeous weather to do some back yard work. I am now hobbled in my right knee again. Woo hoo. The good news is that our back yard looks good and part of our fence row is cleared out. Sort of. It will be an all-winter job to get it cleared.

Now, I must get off of here. There are 8000 other things that I are priorities over this and a kitty has decided to snuggle. It is hard to type with a kitty between me and the keyboard. Enjoy your brand new sparkly Monday.

'Tis The Season

Thanksgiving is now officially over, as is the crazy shopping day known as Black Friday. Since I have shopped on Black Friday in years gone by, I am allowed to criticize, right? It is the people who do it faithfully for years whose sanity I question. Although, I think the people you have with you make or break it. I had a blast last year with my sister Linda and her friend. I also ran into lots of folks I hadn't seen in years. I got a few bargains...but mostly I got alot of cheap crap that was marked down to a ridiculous cheap price. A few of my best bargains:

• Phillippe Richards complete cookware set for $19.99. I noticed JC Penney had this one going again. I actually had to pay full price which was $59.99. The $40.00 rebate involved me mailing my receipt in within a few days of purchase and then my rebate card came in the mail around the first part of March. What a steal! It was cheap cookware than serves me well considering how hard I am on my cookware.
• Hoodies for my girls from Wal-mart. Crap. total crap. They pilled the first time I washed them. One of them was black...aiy aiy aiy. They were instantly declared 'playclothes'.
• PJ's from Walmart. Crap E. McCrap. Way too boxy to fit real bodies and very lousy material.
• A running outfit that no one in the family could wear from...yep...Wal-mart. I can only guess what the quality was on this as it was a bargain never worn.
• A digital camera from JC Penney for Lilly. We were never able to make it work. We tried and tried but it never did anything remotely resembling what it was supposed to do. AND...since it was well into January before we had the time to get around to fiddling with it, it was past the time frame for returning it.

So the lesson learned was to really think about what items my children and Christmas list folk would enjoy getting. I did not want to make out my list from Black Friday flyers because I honestly believe either the merchandise is sub-par or they only have one of whatever spectacular thing there is. I have done very well this year just shopping the pre-Thanksgiving sales and *SHUDDER*-regular priced items. I ordered a few things online and I am happy to say that I am finished with my shopping. Erik and I made one more run last Monday and we finished. I wouldn't trade finished at Thanksgiving for a whole set of Black Friday deals.

How about you? Black Friday fan or foe?

I'm Thankful For...

a holiday that is all about treasuring your family. Thanksgiving is such an awesome day because it is just fellowship. It's all centered around a meal-but the focus is the people you share the meal with.

We'll be treasuring ours, hope you do the same.

Fresh!

It is a fresh new week and I am so glad. Last week was beyond emotionally draining. My friend, Tyanna, died in her sleep early Wednesday morning. That was a complete shock. Her funeral was on Saturday. Almost right on the heels of that funeral was a baby shower for my friend Beth's daughter Kirsten. As soon as I walked into the baby shower and saw everyone, I had to visit the restroom and get it together. It was just too much. Too much raw emotion all in one day. Too much loss. I know in my heart that it is better to move on to the next world with God. But I still selfishly want my peeps here with me. Especially peeps who are taken home too early in my humble opinion. AND, I should be happy for both of these ladies to not be hurting anymore-each in a different way. That is how I will comfort myself as I mourn the recent loss of Tyanna and the 5 year anniversary of Beth's murder.

I am happy for Kirsten who is going to name her Baby girl Georgia Beth after her momma. I am sad Beth isn't here for me to tease relentlessly about being a grandma. Kirsten is loved and well cared for. Her significant other, Justin is wonderful. They both have gorgeous dimpled smiles so there is no doubt this little girl will be a heart breaker!

New week, I embrace you! You took far too long to come around. I am glad I was able to rest up for you and will now enjoy you and be very thankful for the people who are still here with me even as I lament for these two ladies and many more.

Beth, Tyanna-you are peas in a pod. I know you are in heaven chatting about everything under the sun and making sure everyone else is comfortable. You are missed!

Life Is A Vapor

I began this week in a depressed state and so far I just keep going more and more downhill. My friend TyAnna died in her sleep early this week and I am still in a state of shock over it. Even though we have all known she had health issues for a long time, it just happened so suddenly. She leaves behind a daughter Shelbi, who is a friend to both of my girls, and a son Tyson who loves his momma more than anything. Her husband Brad has some seriously HUGE shoes to fill. Tyanna was the type of mom who was just the right balance of loving and expecting much from her kiddos. I've thought about her every day all day since I found out. I've prayed and worried about the family she leaves behind. I've imagined my own family in the same circumstances.

Today I took my friend Jane supper. She has cancer. Alot of it. She is the most amazing woman I have ever known. I cannot even imagine life without her. She is like a ray of sunshine every where she goes. I don't know anyone that does not love her. Even facing all that she is facing, she is STILL a ray of sunshine and a source of encouragement to all around her. I have been praying all day for her. God could heal her if he chooses to and I have been hoping to talk Him into it. Another friend and I are batting around a new ministry idea and we NEED Jane. Really God, you know we do. If she could share with other women some of the things she has shared with me, it would make them hold onto their marriages a little tighter.

We are just a vapor here on this earth. AND, I don't like it one little bit. Treasure your loved ones, people. We have no promise of tomorrow.

R-E-L-I-E-F

I thought this week would begin with a confrontation involving my Little Lilly Loo Hoo. I did some fact checking with my friend Amanda just to make certain and discovered that Lilly's recollection of events was a lie. The details involved some change not making it into the offering plate. It was like a dagger in my heart but we WERE going to church to deal with it. However, it turns out Lilly lied about pocketing money so she would not get into trouble for her friend giving her money. I am so hoping this is a phase she is going through. It is just killing me. We have an episode nearly every day and have for a few weeks. I keep reminding myself that this too shall pass. And we are teaching, modeling, mentoring, lecturing, blah blah blah. Have I mentioned that dishonesty is my most hated personality trait? I start to smolder at the mere idea of a lie, much less an outright one. God is getting me through it when I do well...the rest of the time I am so ill-equipped. I am relieved not to add stealing to the lies. My head might have exploded.

Between that and two rounds of doctor appointments with Mom and Pete, I am beat. Plus it takes all I have to fight the daily hibernation urge that this weather pushes me into. MUST NOT HIBERNATE. MUST NOT. Kids need socialization. heehee.