FLAT-ulence

As a young girl in a house full of girls, farting was kept to an accidental minimum. At school, same thing. It was just shameful. Boys didn't even fart back then...at least not around girls. If one ever slipped out and the sound was acknowledged, it would immediately be covered somehow- examples: That was my shoe! Oops, my belt caught on the desk. What was that strange noise?

Well, the times have changed. Kids-oh my goodness, even the girls!!- love to giggle and cackle over the gas they pass. So, I have tried to roll with the times and have mostly changed my attitude about it in a not really kind of way. As in, I try not to make a big deal of it, but sometimes I find myself launching into a tirade about manners and a long "back in my day" speech. So, balance. We aren't all holding it in all the time (in fact, hardly ever at home) but I am trying to at least establish some social decorum in the 'toot' category.

However, there is a huge barrier that prevents my poot social preferences from sinking in. The fact that we help care for our aging relatives. Apparently, something happens as you get older. Specifically, farts happen as you get older. Sudden undeniable gas explosions. Now, it is my firm belief that these should be completely ignored. Just pretend it never happened while creating a nice distance between you and the shooter. Sometimes though, they are so loud and shocking that there is no time to give the kids a dirty look before they explode into raucous laughter. Unfortunately, being around middle school toot hoots and howls rubs off.

All of that to say this, recently when a very mannerly lady-like member of the family 'cut the cheese', it took every ounce of self-control I had not to laugh out loud which would have embarrassed her to death. There was not even a single child around us so I have no excuse for my childish impulse. Except that farts are never funnier than when they come from someone who 'would NEVER!'